Thursday, January 19, 2012

197.4


My weight is up slightly.  I’ve followed my goals but I have not seen the amazing weight loss that I imagined would accompany the goals I set for myself and it is frustrating.  Intellectually I know I am doing what is best for my body but emotionally I just want to bake those butterscotch brownies or pumpkin cookies with browned butter frosting and indulge.  Instead, I tell myself, No, you have goals you want to achieve.  So then the bargaining with myself begins.   Well, only ONE cookie won’t hurt anything.  I mean it’s just one – right?  No, I tell myself, it won’t be just one.  I have to have an all or nothing approach to my eating because if I give in, I might as well give up.  I can’t seem to do much in moderation.  So, I am feeling frustrated.  I want my cookie but I want results right now too.  But then I tell myself, No, you have to remember the ONE factor.  One day.  One meal.  One minute at a time.  Then I tell myself, effff you.  Then I have to tell myself, POTTY MOUTH!!  No, that’s just your emotions talking.  Fine!  I say.  FINE!  I’ll go buy myself a pair of shoes instead.  At least I know I can find those to fit me. Okay so I'm not all sunshine and roses - welcome to the real me.  I have bad days.  I have off days.  I have I don't give a flying eff days.  Today, I'm having a down day.  It could be because of the rain, it could be because of the weight gain, it could be because I really want a cookie.  But really, I think it is just because.  Do you love me anyway?  

Loves.

8 comments:

  1. Loved reading your post,lol, and YES I love you anyway. You will get there as all things in our life we do hit some hurdles but always manage to get over them. This is one of the reasons we have the SCC to help us.

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  2. You have just expressed what all of us have lived through at one time or another. You may want to check out the Challenge over at my place and join us. It might be just the thing you need to get the enthusiasm back. Your words demonstrate that you know yourself and are determined to stay in charge. That is a win.

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  3. Yes I love you anyway, We all have these days. They suck they def do but remember how far you have come think of all the challenges you have succeeded in an it will help you get threw this one *hugs* cheer up we are here for you!

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  4. I like to weight myself not that often..because you are going to have huge swings in weight. WE all have days when we want the cookie...lol It's normal..good on you for getting some shoes instead. it is one choice at a time. Hang in there.

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  5. Keep going!! :D You can do it, even with a potty mouth ;)

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  6. I love this post... It sounds just like me.

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  7. I think you're thought process is completely normal. We all have those days when he have those conversations with ourselves.

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  8. Weight loss treatment need care with time. It is a way which provide perfection if taken with struggle.

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